oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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