I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
