Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Come share oat with me in your robe
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
