At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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