I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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