I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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