i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
