Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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