zippers are such a cool invention
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
