i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
