Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
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