Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize