we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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