i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
