Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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