did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
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I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
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He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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