ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
