If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
