it wasn't lemon gatorade
kristin has been a bad kristin
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
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