i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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