i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize