Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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