you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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