Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
