How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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