When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
