hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
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He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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