now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Randomize
