some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
