so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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