I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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