i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
