I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
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