I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
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