Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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