Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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