how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
