on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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