are you still at the devil's house?
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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