dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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