Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
