no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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