Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Randomize
