Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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