why didn't you poke me back
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
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