love makes seman taste better
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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