So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize