he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Randomize
