So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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