so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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