4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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